Trivial Tuesday – Unsolicited Advice

What’s Right for You?


There are so many things about being on a diet that just suck.

  • Changing the foods you eat.
  • The period between the time you make the change and the used to it period when you are angry with the entire world.
    • You know you want potatoes and pasta.
    • Grumpy just happens.
  • Teaching yourself to be active when you are very used to being sedentary.
  • Working out!

Yes, it really does suck at the beginning. It hurts! You really wonder why in the world you do this to yourself. All of the changes!

What did you base these changes on? Research. You spent hours and hours reading up on different diets. Deciding which one could be successful for you. Which one wouldn’t drive you insane to be on.

Talking to doctors about the diets you’ve narrowed down.

Speaking with a nutritionist if you are so inclined to do so to double check that the diet might be okay for you.

Discussing with a personal trainer about a schedule for your workouts. Spending your precious time learning what exercise that will give you results without injury. And why did you do all of this? You did it to understand what is right for your individual body.


Unsolicited Advice

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Unsolicited Advice

You have invested that time in you, invested your time into the research and sacrificed for the changes. You’ve made real life changes. Proud of your accomplishments and gains towards your goals? Oh, you bet your patooty you are.

You work your tailor made, individualized, personal program every day of your life. and you’re proud of yourself for finding a program that works for you. Inevitably someone will say you look great! You say thanks!

Maybe they ask what you are doing to create these very personal gains. Sometimes you’ll be able to tell them.

Other times, these sudden experts in what you need will tell you what you should be doing instead.

My eyes roll so hard when this happens. I don’t understand the phenomena myself. How in the world are there so many experts in the field of me?

I don’t really know these people. Most of them are actual strangers. Customers. People I see once or twice and never again.

Yet these people are absolutely in tune with what my body needs to be strong and wonderful.

Excuse me while my eyes roll so far back into my head I have a wonderful view of my brain matter.

  • “You should be full Keto!”
  • “No, Paleo is better!”
  • “CrossFit is more effective!”
  • “Have you tried the barre method?”


Research Backed Indoctrination?

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Cult Indoctrination

As annoying as these deeply intrusive suggestions are when they try to sell it to you it’s worse.   At best I feel like they are trying to indoctrinate me into a cult. At worst I feel like they’re trying to edge in for some sort of financial gain. I don’t have any money!

Why are you hard selling this program to me? What makes you think I need to change my fully researched program? Are my personal gains not enough for you? They feel like they are enough for me. I’m confused now.

Should I do more research into the shake program that was suggested? Maybe dropping down to 500 calories with a bunch of supplements is worth $3,000 if I can lose 40 pounds in a month.

Maybe just maybe all of these people who believe in this or that diet more than anything are right!

Wait, should I second guess all of those hours researching? Should I revisit all of those professionals and re discuss my options for my body? I mean there are so many experts in what Beck needs. I should listen to one of them right? What if all those hours of research didn’t actually prepare me for diet and exercise? Gasp! The horror! The absolute nonsense!


How Do You Respond?

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Response Required

I have no doubt in my mind that you have or are currently doing the research into diets and exercise yourself. Otherwise, why would you even be here on this site reading this mind babble? Of course you have!

What sane person would jump into a program head first without at least reading the Amazon reviews? How does one deal with the proselytizing zealots?

Easy, instead of saying things like that’s interesting, try, “Is that the program you are on?” If no or I used to be is the answer, counter with, “Oh, so what was it that made you quit the program?”

Continue with this line of questioning until they see that the program may not be great for everyone.

If the answer is yes, they are on that program. Begin asking questions like:

  • “How much weight have you lost?”
  • “What are the downsides to this program?”
  • “Do you get gas from your diet?”
  • “How is your energy level on this program?”
  • … and on and on until you stump them.

I have yet to find one time that one of these unsolicited advice givers doesn’t get stumped somewhere along the line. At this point I feel like closing the metaphorical door in their faces as I would anyone else trying to sell me something.

I don’t always do that. If someone is really on a program and it’s working for them, I congratulate them and tell them that I will read up on their diet, exercise, whatever program. I will, if I haven’t actually done that research before.


You Do You…I’ll Do Me

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Set New Goals and Take Action!

Mostly I’m not going to waste much time or a second thought on it. I’ve done my research. I found aspects of programs that are working for me. I’ve tailor made a program for myself. I’m down 39 pounds. I don’t believe I need to research any more diets until I hit a plateau and then I might.

On another note, I’ve started putting a coin into a piggy bank every single time someone gives me their “great” but unsolicited advice. Maybe by the time I hit goal weight I’ll have enough change saved for a really nice vacation.

Keep your heads up! Nobody is more of an expert in you than you are. Keep working your personal program and be proud of your gains and losses. I know I’m proud of you for trying!

Until next time. Be kind to yourself and others.



P.S. If you’d like Ki’s free weight loss progress chart to use for yourself, just submit your name and email in the box at the upper right hand side of this page and it’ll take you to your own free copy.

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